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The solution to low self-esteem is simple

But there’s something I like to do and I think others should as well. It’s called: ‘Not giving a shit!’ Seriously, just not caring what everyone thinks of you because usually the people who disapprove are the ones who you really don’t care about anyway. I know it’s hard to do. You could start your day off by looking in the mirror and thinking, “Yeah, I look hot today. Anyone would be lucky to date me!” And then you walk into that high school and you see one girl that has a cuter outfit. Okay, that’s fine, you still look good, regardless. Then you see another one but she’s in really good shape and you think that she can wear her clothes with confidence because they don’t show any fat. So you put on a jacket to cover your stomach just in case. Then there’s a girl that’s not wearing any make-up and looks gorgeous. You’re wearing make-up and you’re still not as pretty as her so you put on your sunglasses. And all of a sudden you’re hiding in the corner of your class, covered up and hoping no one notices you for the rest of the day. You went from expecting people to stare and gawk at you to wanting to be invisible. Your opinion of yourself changed within a few minutes just because you cared about other people’s opinions of you. 

 
I like to be the person that always makes fun of themselves and that (ironically) thinks I’m all that and a bag of chips. Ironically because…I’m really not. But this makes every day fun. Like most, there are many things I don’t like about myself, but I don’t go around moping about it. I’ll make jokes about my weight and when I’m wearing a particularly cute outfit I don’t hesitate to tell people how adorable I look. People should be comfortable enough to at least do that. To be able to laugh at themselves and accept the way they look and roll with it instead of doing a million things to change themselves. I’m a particularly lazy person and this arrangement seems a lot easier to me. (Plus, worrying makes you break out and that’s just one more thing to hate about yourself.)
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Failed Media

Low self-esteem is so common in teens that it’s practically a graduation requirement. That you were never an official high school student unless you were insecure at some point. It’s a big thing, stereotypically, in teen girls. You will probably never meet a girl that loves everything about themselves; that says, “Yes, my appearance is amazing, my grades are spectacular, I’m so talented, and I’m perfectly fine with everything about myself.” Apparently there is a statistic that says only 2% of women will call themselves beautiful. And how sad is that?! Has it changed over the years? If so, this has to be the worst time for that subject, what with high expectations and people in the media. Where we only allow people who are unrealistically super model-beautiful on TV. It tells girls that these are the only people that are allowed to have that fairytale ending like in that movie. That you have to be stick thin, big boobed, bleach blonde, tan, and wear a lot of make-up to be noticed or go anywhere. And no, when you have the ‘nerdy girl’ in those movies, just putting glasses on them and making them wear ironically dorky, hipster clothes doesn’t make them realistic. It doesn’t matter anyway because in the end she gets a beautiful makeover and the hot, dreamy leading man falls desperately in love with her. (Usually BECAUSE she changed herself.) And teen girls everywhere eat that up! They want that fairytale. They want to be noticed and have their dreams come true. And they can get so desperate for this to happen that they change everything that makes them… them! It’s really sad because what if there was a perfectly nice boy who loved the way you were before and just didn’t get the chance to tell you and then you go and change his dream girl? Now a lot of girls wouldn’t believe in that kind of logic because it’s just downright crazy to think that someone would like them. And THAT is what media and pressure has done to today’s youth. Made them think that since there are so many ways to change yourself, to make yourself ‘better’, that who they really are couldn’t possibly be appealing to anyone. It’s so sad.

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Unrealistic Comparisons and Warped Mindsets

Now if only we could get across the fact that we don’t need to compare ourselves. That we don’t need to try to match up to everyone around us. But let’s be honest, if anyone ever tells you that high school isn’t one big contest, they’re lying. Whether we like it or not, intend to do it or not. No matter what, you’re always being compared to someone or comparing other people, yourself. The worst is when you compare yourself to a particular person or even a group of people. Which is ridiculous when you think about it because how are you supposed to match up to more than one person? And the people you choose to compare yourself to are mind-boggling. 

For instance, you could score a 90 percent on a test and you feel pretty good about it. Then you see the person to your right got a 70 and you think to yourself, “I studied and got what I deserved. They must’ve slacked off. I’m obviously a better student than them.” You look to your left and they scored 100 percent. And just like that, your thoughts do a 180 and you’re perception changes. You think, “Oh wow, well if they got a perfect score I should’ve been able to. Why didn’t I study more. They must be smarter than me. I really need to be more like them.” 
But that’s not the worst part. It’s a whole different mindset when you start comparing yourself to your friends, the people you are supposed to be able to talk to about this. The ones that tell you you’re pretty, that you should ask him out because he’d be lucky to date you. That no, of course that doesn’t make you look fat and yeah, that girl was wearing too much make-up and she does look kinda slutty. But no matter what you hear come out of their mouth, you’re just sitting there thinking, “My best friend is so skinny. What’s her secret?” “I’m so jealous of her hair.” “How does she keep her complexion so clear?” “Where does she get all of her cute clothes? I’m stuck shopping at Wal-Mart.” And, “Oh my God, she’s an entire cup size bigger than me. I hate this!” And that’s just appearance. We also scrutinize and compare our: Grades, jobs, social status, how many people we’ve dated, sexual experience, how much money we have, athletic abilities, morals, and everything in between! 
And even if you’re not comparing yourself to anyone, you’re still never satisfied with yourself. I can look at a picture of myself and find 20 flaws and when someone points out one aspect that they think is good, I’ll reject it immediately. And that’s the thing: when you’ve always had low self-esteem and you’re not used to being given compliments, you start getting angry when you get one. Because you’ve had plenty of time to build up this conception of yourself that you start to believe it to be true. It really is horrible but true.
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